The things that you're about to read regarding my time in Iraq is in no way shape or form to portray myself as a hero or something. When thinking about what my next blog would be, I realized that no one really knows some of the experiences that I had in Iraq. Not even my closest family members including my mother and father. But most importantly, I feel my greater intention is to provide you with my testimony on how God brought me through that year in Iraq.
January 9, 2005 I woke up that morning and began the process of putting my BDU's on (Battle Dress Uniform). Of course I had done this hundreds of times before, but today I was preparing to go off to war. My mother and father had come from Louisiana to see me off. I remember coming out of my room and seeing them both crying. I knew then that the realization had set in for them that this was in fact real, and that their son was indeed going off to serve the country. When I saw them with tears on their faces, all I could repeat to myself was "Lord give me strength." We prayed together, then prepared to make our way to my unit. At the time, I was married and my oldest son Jayden was a healthy four month old baby. I kept wondering why did I have to go. A question I asked God daily upon me me leaving. I didn't want to leave my family, but, when I signed up to be a soldier, I knew that this day would be a possibility. The last thing I remember from that day was the moment it was time for me to go. When I went to hug my mother I started to cry. I remember uttering these words to her: "Make sure that if they ever need anything, please do your best to take care of them (referring to my wife and child)."
When deploying to Iraq, your first stop is to Kuwait. While there, you and your unit go through in-processing, a lot of briefings, training, and setting up to prepare for your push to Iraq. One thing that was a big issue, was the issue of armored vehicles. We didn't have any, and frankly I didn't want to go anywhere without one. We received about two armored vehicles, and it's safe to say that my pay grade ensured that I wasn't entitled to one. So to balance it out, I guess, we had to insert these half inch metal sheets in between our doors. Us being naive, we felt some sort of protection. But knowing what I know now, I realize that we could've walked up there butt naked and we would've had the same protection as that sheet of metal provided us with.
It took us a few days to push to our final destination in Iraq, which is always the case when you're moving tactically in military vehicles. It went rather smoothly until one of our younger soldiers fell asleep at the wheel and a tricky maneuver was coming up. The gunner in that truck noticed at the last second, but, it was too late. They crashed and all three were trapped inside. We had to halt and assume security positions while we also tried to rescue our guys. I specifically remember laying in the sand with my M-16 rifle in a combat position thinking to myself "God, what am I doing here?" We got our guys out and they were airlifted away to safety. By the grace of God, they made it and met back up with us in Iraq. I got a taste on my first official night in Iraq of what I would face for the next year.
My unit was based at LSA Anaconda in Balad, Iraq. It's just outside of Tikrit, the home of the notorious Saddam Hussein. Right after we made it to Anaconda, my NCOIC (Non Commisioned Officer In Charge) and myself decided to go to the chow hall to get something to eat. It was late and we were tired, but we were extremely hungry. Upon leaving and walking to our vehicle, a loud boom and explosion occurred very close to us. We ran like hell to our vehicle and sped off. In theory, that wasn't the smartest thing to do. We really should've made it to the closest bunker instead. As we drove away, I thought to myself that this was going to be a long year.
One thing you think about when you think of Iraq is the heat. And trust me when I tell you that it's real and unforgiving. Iraq has just two seasons, summer and winter. When it's hot, it's extremely hot. When it's cold, it's freezing. It rains a lot during the winter, so you can just imagine how messy it gets when rain hits sand. Especially sand that is comparable to baby powder.
Aside from missing my family, adjusting to life on Anaconda went pretty well. After all, we had: Popeyes, Burger King, Pizza Hut, Subway, several gyms, laundry service, a movie theater, shopping, and a Green Beans Coffee Shop. Living on Anaconda was a blessing and a curse though. We had to deal with rocket and mortar attacks on a daily basis. We had fighter jets, cargo planes, helicopters, and our most important asset, US! So the enemy tried desperately each day to hit something. Sometimes they actually got lucky. They even hit a building right across the street from my shop leaving a huge hole in the roof. The irony of it was that we ended up servicing the National Guard soldiers vehicles that caught the guys who were responsible for that particular attack. While they were waiting on their vehicles, one of the soldiers said to me. "We got the bastards that did that (pointing to the hole in the roof)!" When I asked how did they know, he broke out a laptop. We all gathered around like some school kids. While performing a raid, they found a woman who was trying to hide a camera. Not only was she hiding the camera, she was hiding insurgents too. They took all the people into custody. On the footage that these troops were showing us, showed a familiar attack and a familiar building. It was that building right across the street. They had indeed filmed attacks they had performed including the one that hit the building right across from us.
Other than leaving Iraq for good, the other thing to look forward to was taking your two week leave and going back to the states. I had chosen to go home in August, because my wife was graduating from School, and my little man Jayden was turning one all in the same week. They had went to California while I was gone to stay with her grandparents. My mom, dad, and brother would come out to visit as well. When I landed in Dallas, TX I was treated like a true hero. It was amazing how much love and support I got from those people. There was a huge crowd there to greet us, which made me felt like I was a rock star, or, a politician running for President. I got first class treatment beyond my imagination. They bumped my flight up, ushered me to the front of the security check point amid a round of applause, and even upgraded me to first class for my flight to San Francisco. My trip was good because I got to spend time with my family, and I enjoyed every second of it. Before it was time for me to go back to Iraq, and my parents to go back to Louisiana, my father said to me, "well, it looks like we might have to pick up and go once we get home because a hurricane might be coming our way." I didn't think too much of it, because coming from Louisiana (New Orleans area in particular) we always get threats of hurricanes, but nothing usually comes our way. I guess this hurricane named Katrina had other ideas.
This time when I left my family I was literally depressed. On my way back to my first stop to Kuwait, I didn't want to be bothered at all! I took the blanket and put it over my head, put my iPod on, and basically slept the whole way back. I didn't even eat one meal. When I got back to Kuwait, I couldn't get access to a phone or computer for about two days. When I finally did, I called my wife and she had informed me about the hurricane hitting New Orleans. After hanging up with her, I tried to call my parents. Of course you probably know that I couldn't get through. I went to a computer, turned it on, and the first image that popped up broke my heart. It was the Superdome with the roof gone and water surrounding it. I immediately began to weep. I knew that this was terrible of epic proportions.
I made it back to Iraq a couple days after this, but, I surely didn't want to be there now. When I got back, everyone kept telling me about the hurricane and asking me if my family was alright. I didn't really know until I received an email from my mom stating that everyone was fine and that they were in Lake Charles, LA. We watched all the news coverage about Katrina and it's aftermath. After awhile I just couldn't take it anymore. On a particular day I was in the chow hall with a friend of mine and of course on the t.v. was the coverage of Katrina. They were showing the looting in particular when this civilian trucker said out loud, and I quote: "they just need to shoot all of them bastards!" NO HE DIDN'T! I think I went unconscious. I went off on that dude so bad that my friend had to take me out. All I remember was starting with, "how dare your ignorant ass talk about my hometown and my people like that!" Everything else after that was a blur. At this moment I was really ready to leave. The city that I was so proud to be from was in desperate need. I felt like how can I be here when it's clear that my own people need me back home. The last straw came when me and some other soldiers tried to set up an account to get funds to be sent home for relief efforts. We were told no because of some bogus reason (which to this day I'm still salty about). If you remember, the tsunami in Indonesia had happened around that time as well, and they were taking up donations for it. You talking about a mad somebody (me)! My focus was gone and I needed to get it back.
One morning after PT (physical training), I was going from my room to the latrine (bathroom) to shower when I heard this whistling noise directly over my head then a crash in the gravel nearby. It was a mortar round that had landed about 50ft away from me but did not explode. The rush of adrenaline that I felt at that moment was palpable. I immediately ran to the nearest bunker and thanked God over and over. I knew that if it had exploded that I would've died or been severely hurt. I don't know about you, but I wanna get up and shout just because the Lord was my protector! This was a moment God showed me that even though I was in the most dangerous place in the world, he was going to navigate me through it in his hands. I thank him every single day for that! Another near miss moment came when my roommate and I had walked out of the PX (military version of Target or Walmart), and ten minutes later the PX was hit with a rocket killing three people. Once again, God was looking over his son. Thank you Jesus!
Another dangerous task was having to go out on convoys. I was my Platoon Leader's driver, so when he went, I went. Anytime I was informed about an upcoming convoy that I was to be apart of, I would literally be scared to death to the point I was shaking. If you know anything about the war in Iraq, you know that a lot of soldiers lose their lives on convoys. Your most dangerous enemy is IED's and VBIED's. An IED is an improvised explosive device rigged with a timer or device controlled by someone nearby. Once a convoy passes, that person will trigger the IED causing it to explode. A VBIED is a vehicle born improvised explosive device. Meaning that a suicide bomber packs a car full of explosives and drives that car into a convoy detonating it. It's scary because most of the time you can't see it coming.
On the mornings that we would leave on convoys, I developed a routine that I had to do every time. After our leadership briefed us, I would go sit in my vehicle by myself. I would take out the pictures of my wife and son and kiss them. Then I would close my eyes and pray. The awesome thing was, once I finished praying and re-opened my eyes, the scared feeling was completely gone! No more shaking, no more butterflies. I did this before every convoy. It's almost as if God said to me, "there's nothing to be afraid of my child." I would be cool, calm, and collected. And every time I went on a convoy we were hit with an IED. But to God be the glory, we ALL made it home!
I know this was long, and actually there's more to tell. I just wanted to share this with you to possibly inspire you. No matter what adversity you may face, remember that God has the final say. But I know I made it not just because of my own prayers. I know that I had a praying mother who prayed for me everyday. I know that my family and friend's prayed for my safe return as well. Speaking of my return. You must hear about it in closing.
I knew when I was coming home, but my wife kept telling me not to tell my parents. She came up with every reason for me not to tell. I have to tell you that it was the hardest thing not to do. My mother was becoming anxious about my return home and would constantly ask when I was coming back. When I landed back in Savannah, GA I called my wife and said that I made it and that I wanted to call my parents. She begged me emphatically not to. It was such a happy moment once I reunited with my family. Jayden was getting so big and I was just happy to hold him in my arms. We made our way back to the house so I could get out of my uniform and get comfortable. Once we got around the corner from our house, my wife put my son's blanket over my head. I was like, "what the hell are you doing?" Once we got inside, she screamed "Ms. Wendy!" I couldn't move! I just stood in the hallway shocked. My mom came out and saw me and started to scream "Craig is here!" My dad and brother came out then, and we all hugged and shed tears of joy. I didn't know that they were there, and they didn't know that I was coming home. To this day, other than seeing my babies born, that was the most happiest and joyous moment of my life! Oh yeah, I didn't mention that this happened on Christmas Eve 2005. God is good!
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