Many of you probably already know my discontent regarding this topic. Within society, the issue of light skin vs. dark skin has always been a conversation piece. People have literally drawn a line in the sand about what they prefer, and ABSOLUTELY will not deviate from it. I know that everyone has preferences and I'm cool with that. Hell, even I have a preference when it comes to the opposite sex. But, I also am versatile and will not subject myself to what I prefer only. My preference is light skin women, but I love dark skin women as well! I also love other races and ethnicities, but that's a totally different topic.
For years black men have been given grief for favoring light skinned females with "good hair" over dark skinned females. I put good hair in quotation marks because everyone has their own definition of what good hair is. At the same time many women have claimed to want a tall, dark, and handsome man. For the most part, men have stayed consistent with preferring light skin black women through the years. All you have to do is watch a rap video, and most of them aren't even black. I don't know if it's me, but, it seems as if women have flip flopped back and forth between light skin men vs. dark skin men. There was once a time when guys my complexion and lighter had the advantage when it came to women. I call it the Al B Sure and El Debarge years. I'm just trying to figure out when the dark skin brothas took over. And no I will never call another man chocolate (in case some of you were wondering)! Was it the emergence of Wesley Snipes back in the early to mid 90's? Whatever it is, a lot of women are losing their minds over the dark skin fellas these days.
I wanna ask the ladies a question...Why do you subject yourselves (not all of you) to mainly one specific type of person? Whether it be a light skin man or dark skin man. Why am I specifically asking the ladies this question--it's pretty simple to me--women (black women in particular) constantly complain that there are no good men around. If that is the case, then why limit yourself to strictly a light skin or dark skin man? Your argument will automatically be null and void with me if you only date strictly one or the other, but complain about a shortage of good men. Don't worry ladies, I will address the fellas later. I understand wanting what you want and not settling, but, this to me is solely based on outside physical appearance. Is there something or some way that a dark skin man treats you so differently as opposed to a light skin man and vice versa? I've had women of my complexion and lighter tell me how much they love the dark skin brothas. This includes white women, mixed women, and women of other ethnicities. Since most of you say that you are looking for a man to accept you and treat you like a queen--I take it that (in your eyes), only one or the other provides that for you, right? So I ask you--is light or dark skin really that serious?
To take it back to me for a quick second. I've been given grief by females for years. Most women who aren't light skinned have always automatically judge me saying that they weren't my type because they weren't light skinned. Not true at all! Matter of fact, my ex-wife is darker skinned with short hair. Why does it seem that there is a double standard when it comes to men having preferences in women? I'm sure women are going to say that this isn't true, but, I'm not the only man that sees it this way.
I'll get off the ladies for a second. Onto the fellas now. Let me state once again that I do not hold it against people for having preferences. But I think that men preferring light skin women has caused issues and complexes in females for years. When you look at women in society who are considered beautiful, nine times out of ten they are light skinned. All the light skin women are getting all of the acting and modeling gigs. It's rare that you see a dark skinned woman gracing the cover of a magazine. Not to say that it doesn't happen, but, it's rare. I think that you can even say that because of years of men preferring light skinned women it affects little girls and their confidence. Why is that? Let's face it, it is a male dominated society, and these little girls see what society views as beautiful, and feel that if they're darker then they're not beautiful. And to add to that fact; I've heard boys when I was young and boys now call little girls ugly because they were dark. This plays a part in a young girls self-esteem growing up. Like or not, it does. I've encountered some beautiful darker skinned women that don't think they're beautiful because men have told them they were too dark. I do believe that self esteem is just that--SELF-esteem--but it doesn't hurt when others compliment you and tell you that you're attractive. Even if you already know it.
I'm asking all of you once again...is skin complexion really that serious? I've met some beautiful people physically (whether it be light skinned or dark skinned) that turned out to be some of the ugliest people intellectually, socially, and just not good people overall. That term "everything that glitters ain't gold" couldn't be more true. I understand the importance of being with someone that you're attracted to. I'll actually understand a person being with someone who isn't considered beautiful because they value how that person treats them. Like they say--beauty is in the eye of the beholder. And to be honest, a broken heart doesn't come with stipulations. What I mean by that is; even beautiful people break hearts too. So instead of focusing on if you're on team light skin or team dark skin--you might wanna consider being on team happy and treated well despite what complexion the person is.
I'm not a color struck individual however this blog brought me back to my younger days when darker girls did not befriend me because I was lighter and spoke proper English. I was often told that I spike that way because i think I'm light enough to pass as white. Hurtful? Yes, I never chose friends based on race, color, ethnicity, etc. but on pure commonalities that we shared and enjoyed as children. It bothers me to see the same instances occurring today. My own child will never refer to someone as black or white, light skinned or dark..but she shared with me that the girls at her new school in North Louisiana often don't play with her and a few of the other girls. Why, I asked her...because we are the same color as Ms. Bogan (the white teacher). Well, needless to say I visited her school the day of the pageant to find that the class has mostly African American girls and two caucasian girls and a handful of boys..four of the African American girls had light colored eyes & wavey black hair, 2 with brown eyes and light skin, and my little blue eyed sandy brown hair lighted skinned kid--the precious little group of girls were all pouting because they nor the two caucasian girls were invited to one of the dark skinned girls birthday party because "they weren't dark enough."
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